SO I WAS TALKING WITH MY FRIEND FROM AUSTRALIA ABOUT POPSICLES AND SHE DIDNT KNOW WHAT A BOMB POP WAS SO I MADE THIS FREEDOM CRACK ABOUT IT BEING THE MOST AMERICAN POPSICLE
AND SHE ASKED ME IF I KNEW WHAT AUSTRALIA’S “FAVORITE FROZEN DELIGHT” WAS
I ANSWERED “KOALA”
AND SHE SAID NO
IT’S GOLDEN GAYTIMES
GOLDEN
GAYTIMES
THIS /FUCKING/ POPSICLE
AUSTRALIA GOD /DAMN/ IT
As flakes of fire float down from the sky, crimson oceans brush the sandy beach. As blades swap metal, the fighters don’t give in to their fatigue and wounds. Since the beginning of time, good and evil, light and dark, have always existed. Wars waged over these ideals. Today, this war is between brothers. For decades they fought to prove who was strongest, sacrificed everything so others may live. Now, they finish what they had started on a playground twenty years ago. Just as a large wave crashes into the land, the two collide once again, sparks fly from blade against blade, fire in their eyes and determination burning deep within their souls. Simultaneously, they slice at each others shoulders as they jump back. Blood staining the sand at their feet. Blazing flames lick and bite at their legs, arms and chests, burning what they touch beyond repair.
Letting out final battle cries, they charge at one another and impale each other on their blades. With blood seeping from their fatal injuries, they collapse. The brother with white hair says softly “Seems we won’t find out who is stronger.” Blood splatters on the sand as his brother with brown hair laughs, “It seems we are evenly matched. It was a grand life, brother.” Their souls leave their rapidly cooling bodies, and ascend to the heavens, where they may now rest with the angels.
